I'm Henry's Mommy

Things I Probably Shouldn't Tell You

2011-12-09T20:21:00.001-05:00

1. My son is obsessed with poop these days. As of today, he has been peeing on the potty for one week - one whole week without accidents. He has pooped on the potty once, and it was after I bought him this book:

He loves the book and wants me to read it to him all the time. He asks questions about what the animals and people are doing in the book, and we make jokes about it. Is this a guy thing??

2. I made up a song today called "I love sour cream, and I love cream cheese: if it is cheesy and creamy, I love it." Just thought you should know.

3. I haven't cooked more than once a week in almost a year. With traveling and dealing with a picky eater (which means I would be cooking for one most nights), I have refused to cook real meals. Well, either I have refused or I have been to exhausted to lift a pan. But all that is going to change this week ... I just got home from Publix with close to $200 worth of groceries and plan to do some damage in the kitchen this week.

4. The past month has been hell. Capital H-E-Double Hockey Sticks. Between several health and financial issues (like slamming my finger in the car door, going into shock, and then hitting the babysitter's car and causing $800 worth of damage that same night), I have been hanging on by a thread. One morning, I was in a lot of pain and wanted to remember it. I wanted to remember the pain so I could remind myself of what it was like to hurt that much ... so I could be that grateful when it ended. So I took this:

5. Grey's Anatomy is my form of self-medication. If you need some help, I highly recommend it. Just be careful ... it's addicting. Seriously.

I'm a bad, bad, blogger ...

2011-11-20T13:59:00.002-05:00

I really love to write. And I love to share on my blog. I'm just really bad at it ... and when anything feels overwhelming, my tendency is to ignore it. (Healthy, right?) So to the 3.5 of you who read this ... sorry. The good news (to all 4.5 of us) is I feel a little bit like I am having trouble containing the things that have been rising in me, and I want to share. So there are some posts a comin'.

In the meantime, I will leave you with my new favorite ~~obsession~~ song. And no, it's not because of the associated movie which I haven't seen. :) I just love Christina Perri! Enjoy.

Home, Sweet, Home | Simpsonville, SC

2011-09-09T22:54:00.002-04:00

We've been here 10 days, and all the boxes save one are unpacked. We've painted four rooms and countless feet of trim, hung curtains and frames, and slept A LOT. I decided on a base palate of greys and blues, and one of the colors I love the most is in the laundry room. I got to paint it before the movers came, so it was super easy. It started out as a cream color, and there were lots of black streaks and marks on the wall. It's hard to see in this shot, but here's what it looked like prior to painting:

30 minutes and a half gallon of Behr paint later:

You can tell I took the picture later that night because of the yucky florescent light. But I lurrve the color and have enough to paint Henry's bathroom with it!

Once the washer and dryer were moved in, I added a white shelf (replacing the wire shelf that came in the room originally) and put a basket and tin pail on top. I haven't taken a final picture because I have been doing the mounds of laundry nonstop since we got here. I'll snap one once I have a moment to clear out the room.

Yay for making this house our home and yay for pretty colors. :)

Arrivederci, Italia! | Florence, Italy

2011-09-08T23:12:00.000-04:00

Whew! After a whirlwind of 3 whole days, we have flown home, gotten the keys to the new house, painted two rooms (with help), and moved about 1/3 of our things (also with help). I am so glad to be back in the US! Thank you to all of my friends who prayed for our travels ... God was with us, and I had peace during the trip.

I still can't believe we spent our summer in Italy. We saw so many beautiful places and experienced new culture; I will always be grateful for the opportunity to live there for a season. And I will miss several things:

1. GELATO. Hands down our (and by "our" I mean mine and Henry's) favorite thing about Florence. There is a gelato shop on almost every corner, and we tried most of them before settling on our favorite, which was, lucky for us, right around the corner. My flavor was crema (vanilla), and Henry's was fragola (strawberry) until I converted him to crema. We (no lie) ate it every day, sometimes twice a day.

2. The Diner. We went there for lunch and Sunday breakfast a lot, and they have the best pancakes. Ever. Henry's favorite was blueberry, but he had strawberry the last week we were there, and o.m.g. they were delicious! One of the owners was British and incredibly nice ... he recognized us when we came and was sorry to see us leave. Also, it was nice to be a regular somewhere.

3. The shopping. Italy has two of my favorite stores, Benetton and Espirit. And while these shops are in the US, they aren't in Greenville. Florence has, yes count them, three Benetton stores. :)

4. Our new friends. It's always great to meet new people from around the world, and John's job is the perfect scenario for just that. We made a friend for life in Alessandra.

(Henry fell in love with her right away.)

On our last night in Italy, we spent it like most nights ... gelato in the Piazza Santa Maria Novella.

Walking past our favorite restaurant that was just down the street ...

(We ate here at least 66% of our time in Italy.)

Watching the last bit of daylight hit the Duomo ...

And returning home to our huge, ancient door ...

I snapped a couple of cute pics of Henry along the way.

I loved Italy and our time there. But oh how I love being home. Previews of the house coming soon!

Happy Birthday to My Guy! | Florence, Italy

2011-08-22T04:41:00.005-04:00

I'm a big birthday person. Not big as in big parties or big presents - although those sometimes occur - but big as in emphatically celebrating the life of the person with the birthday. John, however, is not a big birthday person, and we have had some funny experiences through the years. I've gone all out for him, inviting all of his family and friends to a dinner where he was celebrated and sung to - yeah, he really loved that. Then there was the time that I told him not to make a big deal of my birthday (meaning no party or big gift), and he didn't even buy me a card or say happy birthday to me until I started crying over it. Fun times.

(We have learned a lot about each other in the last 5 years.)

So for his birthday this year, I took John to The Diner for brunch. It's this little spot tucked away behind the Duomo that serves American food (we are so sick of pasta and pizza!!). We did some minimal shopping for him afterward, and I didn't force him to try on anything (this is usually a struggle because he would buy something if it fit right but he hates trying things on.) We got some gelato, headed home, and relaxed for the rest of the day.

It was nice, and John had a good day, which was the point. But I feel like my husband needs to be celebrated in a big way. Here's why:

1. He has a huge desire to serve others. When we were first married, we would fight over who would bring the groceries inside because I was independent and he wanted to do it for me. He is always willing to help people without asking for anything in return. John truly has the heart of a servant.

2. He is a genius - he knows it and anyone who has ever worked with him knows it. But John would never brag about his intelligence; it's just the opposite actually.

3. He is an incredible father. He will spend 10-12 hours at the office dealing with billions of dollars and then come home to build forts and play cars and run around with Henry. John encourages Henry, always tries to see things from his point of view, and takes the time to teach Henry.

4. He has made it clear to me and Henry that we are his number one priority and that his purpose is to provide for us and protect us in every way he can. Anytime I share my anxieties with him, he knows he can't fix it, but he always reassures me that I am not in this alone, and he always has my back.

5. I could go on for a while, but I am pretty sure you have jobs or kids to get back to. So, I will end by saying that he is really easy on the eyes.

The Day the Pigeons Lost Their Sh%t | Florence, Italy

2011-08-21T08:11:00.004-04:00

So, I have decided to take a break from my regularly scheduled ~~obsession with~~ thoughts about home decor and tell you a little story about pigeons.

A week or so ago, Alessandra and I were headed towards our usual lunch spot, Il Grillo, with Henry in tow. We were walking past one of the many outdoor eating establishments, when we noticed two pigeons lurking near a table that had not been cleared.

Now, a little backstory is required. The pigeons here are HUGE. They are huge, lurking, beggars who shamelessly bob around the city hoping for crumbs from unsuspecting tourists. (I say tourists because the locals are smart enough to know what happens when you feed them.) They are not afraid. These birds will circle your feet as you eat and will only return to the same spot if you happen to shoo them away with a slight movement (or a kick). Shameless, I tell you.

The second piece of information you need to know is that while I am uncomfortable with aggressive birds, Alessandra has an intense fear of all birds. This is important to know when you live in a city littered with huge, lurking, beggar pigeons.

(These guys are quite small compared to most in Florence.)

So on that day, we were strolling past that now infamous scene where two patrons had left their half-eaten plates and empty wine glasses on the table. Alessandra and I were chatting away about our upcoming holiday trips when two of the fattest pigeons I have ever seen hop up on the uncleared table. They began to peck away at the leftover food, as if taking turns enjoying their feast. Then, they start pecking at lightening speed, fighting over the food. They were going so fast and with such force, their wings began to flutter, and they were hovering/hopping over the food, trying to box each other out. The plates and silverware were clanking together, making a horrible cacophony of beastly gluttony, and the wine glasses were shoved off the table by their fat, little bodies. The shattering glass did not stop their war; these pigeons did not relent until the waiter came to literally beat them away with a stick.

It was seriously disturbing, and sadly, one of the experiences in Florence that I will never forget. And without trying to get all deep on you, I will say that scene reminded me of our animal-like desperation and depravity and demand to be fulfilled. Or, simply put, those pigeons lost their shit.

Color Choices | Florence, Italy

2011-08-18T06:58:00.008-04:00

With the big move coming up, I have a lot of design decisions to make. First and foremost, I want to decide wall colors so that I can have the painting done quickly. Here is a layout of the downstairs part of the house:

(This is a rough draft since I have only seen pictures)

I have decided on an antique white color for section 1 because the kitchen cabinets are oak and the appliances are black. Since it is a rental and I can't change the cabinet colors (which I would paint an antique dark grey btw), the antique white will give some sort of balance and calmness to the space while lightening it up a bit.

But section 2 ... oh, section 2 ... is proving to be a bit harder to decide upon. It's basically a blank slate because we are getting new furniture, so I don't have color constraints there. I have narrowed it down to three colors, inspired of course, by Pinterest. As you can imagine, I have spent a lot of time there lately. So here are my 3 top favs right now:

(1. a creamy light taupe)

(2. a light green)

(3. a medium grey)

I am really going for a calm, soothing, inviting feel, so I think any of these colors would accomplish that. But which one??

Vote for your favorite in the comment section. I'll be sure to post before and after pictures of the final choice!

And the Moving Begins | Florence, Italy

2011-08-16T05:44:00.007-04:00

We return to the States on September 2nd, and we are moving into a new house on September 3rd. I know, it's insane ... but so is our life. Our life has been insane for more than three years now, so insane things are staus quo for us by now. In case you don't believe me - exhibit A:

(Red = trips with all 3 of us / Green= trips that John did alone)

Not exactly a pretty picture, but you get the drift, right? INSANITY.

When we get back from Europe, though, we are moving our belongings and moving ourselves toward stability. We are going to be in, as Izzie would say, an honest to goodness house with an honest to goodness yard and an honest to goodness fireplace. This house will give us a taste of normalcy again. I will be able to decorate the space with my own things in my own style. We will have a driveway for Henry to ride his tricycle and a playroom for us to keep his toys. It feels good.

The stressful part - besides the move itself - is organizing the details from Italy. You see, we didn't know that our current rent would be going up until after we got here, so we had to find a place (with the help of my amazingly generous friend Melanie), transfer utilities, arrange for movers and painters, order moving supplies, coordinate some pre-packing (with my other amazingly generous friend Teresa), all while trying to live our lives here. John says we can use it as bragging rights later, but I say we file it under "that never happened."

So in two and a half weeks - 18 days to be exact - we move towards normalcy. Yes, John will still be traveling, and yes, we will still travel with him a little, but we are taking baby steps towards having a real life again ... a life that doesn't involve having a serious personal relationship with your suitcase and the Delta customer service center. And with those baby steps comes decorating!! (This is the exciting part for me!) I hope to chronicle the transformation of our little rental on the blog, so check back for updates. I may need your opinions on paint colors and fabric! (You can't see me, but I am dancing a little jig right now!!) I mean, who wouldn't want to live here?

(Mint green siding with the white picket fence and everything!)

Bye Bye, Mommy! | Florence, Italy

2011-08-15T11:07:00.000-04:00

My son is a hoot. We never know what he is going to do or say next, and this morning was no exception. Here's how the conversation went.

Me: Good morning, Henry!
Henry: Hi, Mommy! So good to see you!
Me: Did you sleep well?
Henry: Yeah, I sleep good.
Me: I'm so glad. What do you want to do today?
Henry: Uhmm, wherwe's Daddy?
Me: Daddy went back to work, baby.
Henry: No, no work!
Me: Yes, baby, I'm sorry, but Daddy had to go back to work today.
Henry: Nope. Daddy not back at da work.
Me: Well, okay. Go see if you can find him in the apartment.
Henry: Okay. Me go find Daddy! Bye bye, Mommy!

The 1 Year Anniversary of Nothing | Florence, Italy

2011-08-14T04:31:00.000-04:00

Recently I realized that I had not written on the blog in close to a year. At the time of my last post, we were preparing to move to Erie, PA, with John for his next assignment. When we found out (at the 11th hour) that he would be living in a hotel, we made the painful yet logical decision to find a home base for me and Henry in Greenville. I was already having nightmares about losing Henry in a 20 foot snow drift, and the thought of us stuck in a 10x12 room for four months made me want to pluck my eyeballs right out of their sockets. So we settled in to a beautiful apartment and adjusted to the most obvious drawback - life without John during the week. We took advantage of the stability, though, and reconnected with close friends, restarted regular therapies for Henry, and went to the gym every day for me. Life became somewhat normal again.

We settled in to our new place:

Took Henry to his first college football game (via iphone):

Painted pumkins with best friends:

Celebrated Halloween as Handy Manny:

Celebrated Christmas with cars and trains:

Endured our first real winter storm (via iphone):

Continued to grow like a weed (via iphone):

Went to Henry's first Greenville Drive game (via iphone):

And beat the start of the summer heat in our pool and Bennett's pool (via iphone):

We left for Europe in late June (which I will share in a separate post), and we return stateside in 3 weeks! Henry starts 3K soon, so I propose I will have more time for writing. See you soon ... or next year!

It's all the OT's fault! | Atlanta, GA

2010-08-30T09:24:00.006-04:00

So you may or may not know, but we started Henry in Occupational Therapy this month. A few months ago I noticed he was having some trouble with certain activities (like jumping, for one) that the other kids his age in Gymboree class were doing well. That started a long process of trying to find an affordable evaluation - do you know that most private agencies charge $600+ for a two hour evaluation that insurance does not cover?? - and some answers for him. We were told that because he is the size of a three year old in a two year old's body, he has some sensory processing problems and could benefit from OT. So, we met with the OT for the first session last week, and he told me to take Henry on walks. He said to let him touch things and for me to describe them as soft, smooth, hard, etc. and that would help some of his sensory input. So, when we went to the park this weekend, I did just that. We talked about the flowers and trees and leaves, we touched the river stones, and we ran along the paths. If you know me at all, you know I hate the heat, and I especially hate bugs and heat. (The spider, to me, is the epitome of a demon is earthly form.) This walk was filled with gnats and flies and mosquitos in the 257 degree weather, but I will do anything for my child. On the final walk to the car, I coaxed Henry over to a large tree so he could feel the bark. He put his hand on the tree with mine, rubbing it to feel the bark against his skin, and then PART OF THE TREE MOVED. And I don't mean the branches were swaying in the wind. No, part of the acutal tree trunk moved. It only took a split second for me to realize it was A HUGE FREAKIN SPIDER!!! This thing was the size of my palm, and it was perched on the side of the tree, thinking it was all sly, just waiting to devour my child's hand. Naturally, I screamed like a little girl and jerked mine and Henry's hands away, causing him to cry. I probably scarred him for life, but I would rather evoke a natural and logical sense of fear related to spiders than have him eaten alive by this monstrous, hairy form of PURE EVIL. I scoured the internet to try and find this thing, and this is the closest representation I could find:

See? You see how it tries to blend in so you won't notice when you invite your child to touch the tree and it turns out to be this hideous thing?? Therefore, I am going to be on max alert from now on during our walks. And, even though Henry did not lose an appendage to this man-eating monster, I do know one thing - this is all the OT's fault.

Just a regular Saturday | Atlanta, GA

2010-08-29T10:46:00.007-04:00

I am trying to keep things as normal as I possibly can before we move. Henry craves routine and structure more than his mom (if that is possible), and I want this transition to be as easy on him as it can be. So we spent our Saturday as we would any Saturday ... cuddling in the morning, playing with his tools and cars, wrestling with Daddy, going to the park to swing and run around. And, of course, putting him in the highchair so I can try and get at least one clear shot of him. Cause if he's not restrained, he's a blur ... no matter how fast the shutter speed is set!

Working on Handy Manny's toolbelt:

What's going on?

Oh, Mom's got the camera again. Seriously??

Maybe if I pretend to smile she'll stop?

Maybe if I pretend really, really hard??

Swinging at the park makes him happy:

So does Daddy:

And running ...

We may be looking at a crazy transition ahead, but today ... well, today was just a regular Saturday.

Hodgepodge | Atlanta, GA

2010-08-28T13:13:00.010-04:00

I have been boycotting my blog. I'm not sure why ... I just didn't feel like writing for a while. Anytime I made it over here and I attempted to post something, a voice within me said, "No, no, no, no way." So I didn't. But now I have a lot to say.

1. We are moving to Erie, PA, next month. I am still not really sure how I feel about it. I go between being at peace with living in a small, cold place and picturing me losing Henry in the walls of snow. Visions of sugar plum faries vs. visions of me holding him above my head bench-press style while I wade through mounds of snow and ice. My friend Liz is moving there, too, so I won't be without moral support. I just feel ambivalent. Not to mention the fact that we have to drive 18 hours from our vacation spot to Erie.

2. I have been able to do some photography shoots in the last few months, and it felt great to be behind the camera again. An engagement session and two family portraits have never felt so good!

A handful from Jessica and Ahren's engagement:

One from the Castaneda family:

And one from the Paredes family:

3. Henry turned two at the end of last month. It's kind of a blur and definitely surreal. I have a TWO YEAR OLD. It's been amazing watching him grow and learn, and I'm not sure how it's happening, but I love him more every day that passes. We celebrated in Ruffin at Granma and Pappy's and again here in Atlanta.

Henry laughing at his cousins before cake time:

A cake perfect for him - it has cars!

Tired of the camera already:

Playing with his cars outside:

Three of his favorite things - sitting with daddy, brushing his teeth, and his hat:

In Atlanta, we celebrated with Henry's friend Sophia, who had a birthday just before he did.

No matter how hard I fight the idea, he is growing up. It's not that I don't want him to grow and become the man God has created him to be; it's not that I don't want him to be his own person and have a voice. It's just hard for me to let go of the idea that he is not a baby anymore. Moms, you know what I'm talking about, right? When I think about him growing up, there's this permanent, visceral ache from my heart all the way to my uterus, which, ironically, is where he grew from a desire into a baby. And that baby, MY baby, is two years old.

4. Many of you know my husband is a HUGE Bret Favre fan. John has followed Bret's career for as long as he can remember, and he has always wanted to see him play. Favre has said repeatedly that this is his 20th and last season (you never know, he could be telling the truth??), and it would be a dream come true for John to see him play before he actually retires. So this week I set out to get us some good, affordable seats to one of his games, and through StubHub, I found 2 seats on the 50 yard line and 7th row for the Detroit Lions game that did not break the bank!! Needless to say, I bought them right away. Detroit is only 4 hours from Erie, and it is a 1pm game, which means we can leave Henry with a sitter, drive to the game, watch Bret Favre kick some Detroit bootay, and drive home that night. See Bret and not have to spend the night away from Henry = Daddy and Mommy happy! I am so excited for John!!

There's so much more I could write, but I'm done for now. Henry's sleeping, John is watching golf, and I am ready to curl up with a good book.

Travels | Orlando, FL & Warwick, RI

2010-06-19T20:02:00.005-04:00

I could start this post by saying it's been too long or we've been gone or Henry's been sick. But I won't ... I'll just start this post. Here are the highlights:

Taking a break from packing for our two week trip while wearing his new super cute pajamas!

We didn't take too many pictures in Florida. We were too busy lounging by the pool. (Don't hate.) I broke out the camera the day we left.

Once we got to Rhode Island, Henry spent most of his days playing in the backyard. John grabbed these with the camera when I was hanging with Caroline. I loved these shots - way to go, Daddy!

Also, John bought me a new iphone cover while we were there!!

Henry started feeling bad just before we left and wasn't in the best of moods.

Not to mention the fact that he was bitten by one of the guinea pigs. Here's the culprit:

We are glad to be back in Atlanta, but it has taken some time to get settled in again. Thankfully, Henry is well now, and we are trying to get back to normal.

Whew.

Back Again | Ruffin, SC

2010-04-19T21:03:00.002-04:00

We headed back to Ruffin for our home return this weekend. We spent most our time outside - we had gorgeous weather! Henry loved every minute of it ... he discovered sweet gum balls and pine cones and explored tractors and wet dog noses and fields. His daddy even taught him how to spit off of a bridge! John and I played cornhole and drove Henry around on the gator. On Saturday, Leha brought the kids, Gma came over, and Pappy cooked chicken on his big grill. After dinner, we all went back outside to play baseball. It was a good day.

John caught some of the action on his iphone. Here's Avery driving Henry around:

And Henry driving the tractor:

Love that visor ... he looks like a little golfer!

Vacation, Baby! | Atlanta, GA

2010-04-05T10:42:00.007-04:00

It was more of a staycation, I guess. John had FIVE straight days off of work, and we had him all to ourselves! It was awesome.

We went to Stone Mountain Park for the day on Thursday, and it was our first trip there since we've been here. The park is quite big and there are a lot of fun things to do. We wanted to pace ourselves, so we chose to visit the plantation and its petting zoo. Henry has been making the sounds for a sheep this week, so we thought it would be fun for him to see a real sheep and talk to it. :)

The animals were hungry, so they were a bit unruly. When we got there, they were about to eat, so they came charging around the corner.

On Friday, we went to Zoo Atlanta for the day. John decided to get us a yearly pass, so Henry and I can go back whenever we want!

They had a petting zoo as well, and this one was much better - more animals and more accessiblity.

Henry liked carrying the map. He was our entertainment director. :)

And he was in the carseat for all of 60 seconds before he fell asleep.

The weather was absolutely gorgeous, so we headed to the pool that afternoon. Despite the freezing water, John and Henry got in the water! The apartment manager said they were the first swimmers of the season! After we got home, we let Henry play and eat his snack while still wearing his swimming suit - How adorable is he??

My two guys - I fell in love with these shots as soon as I saw them in the back of the camera.

And of course, a post would not be complete without a phone shot and an eyelash shot.

Snacking with mommy.

And another favorite - his Clemson shirt! The fabulous Jonathan and Lindsey Edens gave him that for his birthday last year!

On Easter morning, we took some family photos. Love.

We had Rachel and Suzanne over for Easter lunch. I made a pork tenderloin with pineapple bourbon glaze, broccoli, new potatoes, and tomato and fresh mozzerella salad. I also tried Emeril's recipe for sweet orange tea. Very yummy.

We tried to get a group picture, but between me being dissatisfied with my picture and Henry wiggling all around, it was pretty difficult. This is us laughing in the meantime.

After his nap, Henry dove right into his Easter basket, which consisted of Hot Wheels hidden in big plastic eggs, a book about ducks and colors, and a horse. He had a few chocolate treats, but I only let him have a little taste. He spent the rest of the afternoon playing with his cars.

If you read that whole thing, you deserve a treat! Go have a peep and a mini snickers! :)

Hope everyone had a fabulous Easter! He is risen!

What Do I Give? | Atlanta, GA

2010-03-29T11:53:00.005-04:00

This morning I read the story of Mary pouring perfume of Jesus' feet and wiping them with her hair. She was accused by others of being wasteful, but Jesus saw her behavior as an act of sacrifice, love, and admiration. He told them to leave her alone. Mary was at His feet, giving Him her best.

Things I Learned This Week | Atlanta, GA

2010-03-27T10:33:00.006-04:00

There have been all sorts of happenings around the Mart house this week, and I've been trying to process them, but it's been hard to keep up.

1. On Wednesday evening Henry woke up crying. It's not unusual for him to cry out in his sleep on occasion, but this time he was actually crying. I went into his room, closed the door and its light behind me, and picked him up. He put his head on my shoulder - as he does every night before bed - and I gently swayed from side to side, hoping he would feel safe and loved and could rest again. Tom Conlon's voice went through my head, singing, "and you can lay your head down slowly, your head down slowly, like a child would." I thought about how blessed I was to be there in that moment, to feel that maternal, gutteral bond with my child. I breathed him in and thought, "He smells like sleep." After laying him back down, I closed the door behind me again and stood tall, praising God for His gifts and for my family.

Last night was a different story. He woke up crying again, but this time it was because he was projectile vomiting. Henry has never truly thrown up before (spitting up and coughing things up don't really count, right?), and I think we were all in shock. Thank goodness John was there to help or else I may have dropped my basket. Picking him up, I carefully placed him in the bathtub and washed away the yuckiness. I stayed up with him for most of the night, holding him, sleeping with him on the couch, continuing to wash away the yuckiness when it came. At one point John and I were in bed with him between us, talking quietly in the dark, recognizing we were going through a rite of passage as parents. As they both fell asleep, I watched them breathe, and again I was grateful that God had given them to me. But this time, Henry did not smell like sleep.

2. My husband is an extremely generous man. I already knew that, but I was reminded of just how truly giving he is this week. You see, I have been working out for a while now, and exercise is very important to both my mental and physical well-being. Going to the gym is the one time each day that I can have a break from being a mommy and concentrate on doing something for myself, which any stay at home mom will tell you is very important. I have always wanted to work out with a trainer, but I never wanted to spend the money, especially now that we have gone from 3 incomes to 1. But John, being the awesome guy he is, insisted that I take advantage of a special at the gym and sign up for a personal trainer. Then, if that weren't already enough, he ordered a fitbit for me. I had been looking at one for weeks, and he wanted me to have it, so he ordered it. To me, he did much more than spend money on something that I like. He took an interest in what's important to me and had a desire to help me reach my goals. It was love.

3. I have been praying with Sacred Space for a while now, and this week, in anticipation of Easter, I have been particularly moved by some of the prayers. I thought I would share them with you.

"At any time of the day or night we can call on Jesus.
He is always waiting, listening for our call.
What a wonderful blessing.
No phone needed, no e-mails, just a whisper."

"Cleanse my heart and soul
so I may live joyously in your love."

"To be conscious about something is to be aware of it. Dear Lord help me to remember that You gave me life. Thank you for the gift of life. Teach me to slow down, to be still and enjoy the pleasures created for me. To be aware of the beauty that surrounds me. The marvel of mountains, the calmness of lakes, the fragility of a flower petal. I need to remember that all these things come from you."

The sentence I italicized seemed specifically for me. I tend to move fast, get things done, check off the agenda, and I am always in need of more stillness.

4. My son is becoming more and more of a character every day. He can say "apple," and "bubbles," and his favorite, "oh yeah!" He can play catch and is obsessed with cars, particularly Hot Wheels. He likes to be shirtless, as if he is all grown up. Where is the time going?? He will be two this summer!! This week, I have come to believe all those people who knowingly said, "It will fly by! He will be all grown up before you know it!"

Our Weekend with Friends | Greenville, SC

2010-03-23T13:12:00.004-04:00

We had such a great time last weekend visiting friends in Greenville. We got to see Bennett again, and he and Henry played for the first time since they've become toddlers. And by "play" I mean fight over balls and take toys from one another. It was a precious sight, considering these two have been hanging out since they were in the womb. See how adorable our little friend is?

They were so active and on the go while we were there, so it was hard to get a picture of the two of them together. This was as close as I got.

Henry also got to see his friends Grayson, Selah, Hudson, Simon, and Kate while we were in town! He had a packed social schedule. :)

John was able to meet us on Saturday, and he and I went to a party for our friends Eric and Katie, who are having a baby boy in 2 months! I felt so grateful to be able to see most of our friends from GE while we were there. I told John it felt as if we had never left. It felt like home.

A big thanks to Mel and Brian for letting us stay with them again and to Ashley, Charlie, Julissa and Nate for having us at the party. We love you guys!

Big Boy Table | Atlanta, GA

2010-03-17T13:00:00.003-04:00

Henry has been intrigued by the tables and chairs in his classes at church and the gym. Now that he can climb into the chairs by himself and since he is trying to color, we thought we would get him his very own big boy table. I did a little research and found the perfect one at ToysRUs! As soon as we got it home, I set him up with his crayons and his cars, and he was content for over an hour. He had a blast! Check him out!

Then he started doing this:

Because I showed him how to do this:

Then it was back to the cars ...

But all the playing made him thirsty, so he started drinking from my water bottle.

I have a feeling we are going to have a lot of fun with the big boy table!

Grama's Birthday | Beaufort, SC

2010-03-15T08:54:00.001-04:00

My mom trailed my dad by a month, but they both turned sixty recently. We celebrated with my dad back in January, so John, Henry, and I went back to Ruffin for the weekend to visit my parents to celebrate with my mom. We all (including Gma) made the trip to Beaufort to meet Leha and the kids for dinner, and my parents qualified for the senior citizen discount! How crazy is that ?!?! Afterwards, we went back to Leha's to have cake and ice cream.

Everyone wanted to help blow out the candle.

The kids picked out a funny card for my mom.

Grama with all five grandchildren ...

Four cousins, three dogs, and one cat later, Henry didn't know what to think!

Follow Through | Atlanta, GA

2010-03-09T08:32:00.004-05:00

Yes, I watched it. Even though it was cheesy and dramatic, I watched The Bachelor Wedding last night. I have to say, I was a little surprised at the connection between Jason and Molly ... I know they were getting married and all, but their love seemed genuine and not at all contrived for television ratings. The best part was when Chris Harrison announced that Gavin DeGraw was there to sing her favorite song for their first dance. I really love that song, and I felt it was so fitting for that moment. Just in case you haven't heard it ...

Being a person with a history of betrayals, this song speaks to me on a particularly deep level. And as I was watching them dance and listening to the words of the song, I felt incredibly grateful for my husband. One of his first promises to me was to be unlike all the others, and he has kept that promise every day of our relationship. He knows how to follow through.

19 months | Atlanta, GA

2010-03-03T18:55:00.002-05:00

Another day inside equals more pictures. And as usual, I took a lot.

I can't get enough of those eyelashes ...

One of his favorite books ...

Starting to get tired of the pictures ...

Seriously, Mom?

But it was nothing a little tickling couldn't fix.

How he rolls | Atlanta, GA

2010-02-25T19:20:00.004-05:00

He's a quick little bugger, but I have been able to catch a couple of shots of Henry being silly. You can't tell by looking at this first photo, but he is "singing" into his microphone here. Like mother like son? :)

He loves my sunglasses and wants to wear them all the time.

He is just all around adorable.

Singing and sunglass wearing - it's how he rolls.

Random Things | Atlanta, Ga

2010-02-24T13:50:00.004-05:00

In each new city we move to, I find consistent themes that appear to be true for most of the city. In Atlanta, one of the themes seems to be bad parking. At first I thought that the folks at our apartment community just had some unspoken rule that it was okay to take up two spaces or to park diagonally in a space, but I soon found that most people in Atlanta hold to this mantra. At the mall, the bookstore, the doctor's office, Starbucks, Target - you name it - people park like this. What is up with that??

The one place where parking seems to be normal is at the gym. Maybe it is because the lot is kind of small and spaces are hard to find - I'm not sure. I do feel this gives the people who go to the gym a little credit in my book ... like they too prefer order and don't understand why other drivers will not comply. Also, the gym has been a pretty interesting place in regards to the class instructors. In Greenville, most instructors are super buff and tan and all around "cool like that." Here, I have a Russian female bodybuilder teaching my bodyworks class, a very average-sized, normal looking girl teaching my pilates class, and an older lady that I swear to you looks and talks just like Joey's agent Estelle (from Friends) teaching my yoga class. Seriously. I keep waiting for her to say, "Joey! It's Estelle!" in her thick New York accent. The cultural variety is refreshing and exciting.

And speaking of exciting ... we found a church on the first try! This may not seem that exciting to some, but we spent forever trying to find a church we liked in Milwaukee, and once we found somewhere comfortable, we only had a few weeks before we had to leave. The church here has people from all age groups and many different races and cultures, they have a fantastic children's program, and they are very service oriented. In fact, this Sunday is "Faith in Action" day, and instead of a Sunday morning service, everyone is headed to a local school to volunteer on indoor and outdoor projects as well as hang out with some of the students. This church also has a focus on the arts as well as super friendly people who will reach out to you without seeming fake or having an agenda. It is a perfect fit, and I am so grateful to God for answering that prayer for us. It's been so difficult to find a place to call home since we left DCF, but another cool thing about Atlanta is that two people from our DCf family, Suzanne and Rachel, are living here, too! I had no idea that either of them had moved here, but Suzanne saw one of my FB posts and let me know that she was here! And Rachel has been gracious enough to babysit Henry for us a couple of times, and he really loves her. Another perfect fit. :)

I am excited to see what else Atlanta has in store for us!

Virtual Yard Sale | Atlanta, GA

2010-02-20T13:49:00.002-05:00

So I have been thinking for a while that I may sell a couple of things that are just sitting in storage and not being used. It seems wasteful to me that these items are just there when someone else could be using and enjoying them over the next 2-5 years. So, if you are interested, send me an email at mart.lindsey@gmail.com.

Item 1: Puff Rocker
This is perfect for rocking little babies or just curling up with a good book. It has a custom blue and brown twill cover, and it was only used for about 6 months.

Here is what a puff rocker looks like:

And here is what our puff rocker looked like with 6 month old Henry:

You can't really find these used, so I thought it would be cool to find someone who was looking for one at a discounted price. It originally cost close to $400, but I would be glad to get offers.

Item 2: Dell 22" Flatscreen Monitor
I used this monitor for about a year with the photography business, and I hate that it is sitting in the storage unit all by its lonesome. I don't have a picture of it, but if you are interested, we are headed to Ruffin soon for my mom's birthday, and I can try to grab some shots of it then.

Item 3: GoBee Bag
Love this bag. Brand new, it looks like this:

And you can get more info about them HERE. I used mine for 1 and 1/2 wedding seasons, and it served me well, but again - someone else could be using it.

Email me at mart.lindsey@gmail.com if you are interested!

Au Natural | Atlanta, GA

2010-02-11T13:20:00.003-05:00

I've been thinking for a while that I wanted to go back to my natural color. Who knows how long I've been coloring it ... there have been light blond streaks, blond chunks, light brown streaks, dark brown chunks ... I've had variety. Turns out, my natural color is pretty dark.

What do you think?

I'm not so sure ...

This may call for some highlights ...

Our Pajama Morning | Atlanta, GA

2010-02-05T13:23:00.004-05:00

This morning we woke to the rain tapping on our windows again. Since Henry's not feeling well, I decided we would have a pajama morning. For us, this includes lots of playing and snuggling in our pj's ... and picture taking. :)

Sometimes he moves so fast, all I can get in focus is one eye. But it's the cutest eye you've ever seen ...

You can tell by the crusty nose and the chapped cheeks that he is not feeling his best. He doesn't let on though - he still enjoys giving kisses (to mommy or to his animals) and playing in his wagon.

I caught this one and laughed hysterically when I saw it in the back of my camera!

What woman in her right mind wouldn't kill for these eyelashes???

God, I love this boy.

Pajama mornings are the best.

Out of the dark | Atlanta, GA

2010-02-04T09:05:00.001-05:00

We are settled in Atlanta. I signed Henry up for 3 Gymboree classes per week, and I found a gym for myself. I grocery shopped at a Publix. I found the Whole Foods and Fresh Market, and I discovered the Target, which is less than a mile from our apartment.

I feel like I can breathe again. I feel alive for the first time in a long time.

The last two months were very difficult. I love my family, and I love where I grew up, but I've always known - even as a small child - that I didn't quite fit there. I believe I was created to experience the world, to live in a place with other cultures, and to be a part of a community larger than Ruffin. I have never felt like myself there ... the most honest description is I've felt small and stifled. This is not meant to offend or judge anyone who lives in a small town - it is just my experience.

Needless to say, spending two months being back in Ruffin with my parents and taking care of Henry while John was away working was very hard. I was sad, more anxious than normal, and really just the worst version of myself. I regret that I could not pull it together better. I just couldn't. But looking back, I feel it was one of those "Footprints in the Sand" seasons of my life, and I know that nothing I did helped me make it through.

I'm glad to be on the other side. I feel relief. I feel gratitude - to God for grace and to my family for not killing me. I feel hope again. Finally.

Keep Breathing | Ruffin, SC

2010-01-14T20:51:00.003-05:00

It's all I can do.

Christmas 2009 | Ruffin, SC

2010-01-06T12:43:00.005-05:00

From the beginnning of our marriage, John and I decided that we wanted to have Christmas at our own home every year. We spent the first three in our house - just the two of us. Last year, we were in our apartment, and we had 5 month old Henry to celebrate with us. For Christmas 2009, our home was in Ruffin, so we celebrated with my family.

Waiting for Christmas to begin!

Opening presents with daddy.

Henry got overwhelmed pretty quickly, so we moved on to breakfast. He's started making faces at the camera when I tell him to smile.

In the afternoon I took him out to his favorite swing to get some quiet time alone with him.

He loves to swing so much ... classic Henry here.

I felt so blessed to celebrate the birth of Baby Jesus with my baby boy. Hope everyone had a Merry Christmas, too!

Freak of nature | Baltimore, MD

2009-11-30T10:11:00.004-05:00

I've always been an anxious person. My whole life I have battled fear, and the "what if's" have plagued me for as long as I can remember. When I was pregnant with Henry, my mind began to wander to what could go wrong. I would always attempt to balance that out with the joy of being pregnant and the hope of what was to come, but at times it was still a battle. I started asking John questions like, "What if he is born with Down Syndrome?" or "What if he has a cleft palate?" to which he would reply with something awesome like, "We will still love him" or "No matter what, it will be okay." As my pregnancy progressed, the questions got more frequent and more ridiculous. The day I realized that I am truly, in fact, a freak of nature was when we were eating dinner, and all of a sudden I blurted out, "What if he is born with BOTH GIRL PARTS AND BOY PARTS?!?!?" John just looked at me with a mixture of love and pity, and we simultaneously burst into laughter. Seriously??

Unfortunately, the battle rages on. With each passing stage, I fear autism and swine flu and late development. The most recent is walking. Henry is slowly making his way to it, but if a child doesn't walk by 18 months, he is considered to have physical developmental delay. He turns 18 months on January 31st, and I feel like I have a countdown clock above his head, as if armageddon will occur if he's not walking by that date. The worst is that this fear robs me of just enjoying my time with him and celebrating who he is today. It's an ugly fight.

Day to day, I hold onto the Truth. I ask for help. And I feel grateful that God has given me this precious little person to love. And he is so loveable ...

"Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life."

Day trip | Washington, DC

2009-11-16T09:47:00.006-05:00

One of the perks of this crazy, what-the-heck-are-we-doing job is that we get to go on lots of day trips to nearby places that, let's face it, we would not be able to go to until Henry is driving. This weekend we drove the short 50 minutes to Washington, DC, to do some sightseeing. This was John's first trip and my second.

Elvin, one of John's coworkers from China, is in the US for the first time, and he came along with us. He was so excited to see everything and soaked it all in; it was awesome to watch him experience DC.

We started off at the Capital Building. My view from the street:

I have to say I was a bit enamored with it ... maybe because it's historical and current. Maybe because it is such a gorgeous building. Maybe because the leaves and the sky were beautiful. I don't know ... I just know I took a lot of pictures of it!

View from the back of the Capital:

As we walked down the National Mall, we decided we needed a Starbucks break. And the light in that place was awesome!

After refueling, we headed to the National Air and Space Museum. John, being the Mechanical/Aerospace Engineer he is, had a field day in this place. As soon as we walked in, he started pointing out the planes he knew and telling us why they were famous.

Two of his favorites were the Spirit of St. Louis - the plane that Charles Lindbergh piloted on the first solo nonstop transatlantic flight:

And the Bell X-1 Glamourous Glennis - the first aircraft to break the sound barrier:

We could have spent all day there, but we wanted to see the rest of the sights, so we set out towards the Washington monument.

Next, we headed to the WWII Memorial. I was most excited about this one because it had not been completed when I was in DC last. It was amazing.

One of the most moving parts of the WWII Memorial was the wall of stars. There were 4,000 stars, one for every 1,000 American lives lost during the war. In front of the wall, there was a marker that read, "HERE WE MARK THE PRICE OF FREEDOM." It was almost impossible to get a great shot with the gear I had and the amount of people around it. This was my best effort.

The reflecting pool, which does a great job:

The Lincoln Memorial:

The view from Abe's steps:

Henry was enjoying himself.

The Vietnam Memorial:

And the culmination of all our walking, the White House.

Things I loved about the White House:

1. Elvin's excitement upon seeing it.
2. Seeing Michelle Obama's organic garden.
3. The Secret Service agents on the perimeter carrying machine guns and looking like all-around bad asses.
4. Watching the steel gates open and close - they don't play around with those things.
5. Taking my son, even if he doesn't remember, to one of the biggest symbols of history and freedom in our nation.

It was a great day.

Mothering so far | Baltimore, MD

2009-11-11T08:27:00.006-05:00

Being a mom is one of the most rewarding and most challenging roles I've ever taken on in my life. There's the exhiliration when your baby crawls for the first time, the warm, melt-your-heart, I've-never-been-this-happy goodness when he comes over just to kiss you, and the deep, abiding contentment when watching him sleep. On the other hand, there's the extreme exhaustion, the lugging of all kinds of crap just to go to the grocery store, and the OH MY GOD I'M GOING TO IMPLODE IF YOU DON'T STOP SCREAMING moments. Yeah, those are fun.

But one thing that I have recently discovered that is probably blatantly obvious to most people with a brain - mothering a toddler is very different from mothering an infant. Babies don't move - duh - so they will just lay there while you do just about anything. Before Henry became mobile, I could exercise, balance the checkbook, do the laundry, and he would watch me contently. It was like I had my own personal little fan club. (Okay, I realize he had nothing better to do, but doesn't your own personal little fan club sound nice?) Toddlers move - duh - so now I am lucky if I can brush my teeth by 3pm. If having a baby stretches you, then having a toddler pulls your limbs right out of their sockets. But don't be fooled - as exhausting as it is, I am always there, right by his side. And when he reaches for me to hold him, I jump at the chance - disjointed limbs and all.

Here's a shot of my own personal little fan club on this date last year. Aaaahh, those were the days.

15 months | Baltimore, MD

2009-11-10T15:59:00.005-05:00

These days the only way I can get a clear picture of Henry is to strap him in his high chair and hope he'll last five minutes without screaming to get down. So, that's exactly what I did. Can you believe he is 15 months already??

He is getting another canine tooth in (making it a total of 13), so he is chewing and drooling on everything. But it's nothing a little itsy bitsy spider won't cure for the camera ...

Once he did start screaming to get down, I tried to entertain him with two of his favorite toys - a phone and a car.

At his 15 month appointment today, he weighed in at 30 lbs and 35.5 in long. Does anyone else have a kid that size?? Are they 3 years old??

Halloween | Ruffin, SC

2009-11-08T11:57:00.001-05:00

We haven't been home since May, so it was nice to make it back to Ruffin in time to celebrate Halloween with my family. Leha, Mark, G-ma, and the kids all came over to see us, and we spent the day grilling (thanks, Dad!), riding the gator, chasing the cats, looking at the horses, and napping. It was such a relaxing time.

Once dinner was over, the kids dressed up in their Halloween costumes and obliged me with a few pictures. It was really hot that day, so Henry didn't last in his monkey suit long, but he was pretty adorable while it lasted!

That costume was a 2T, but he was too tall for it!!

Seriously, Mom?

Bret and Emma weren't too keen on sitting still long enough to take more than one or two pictures, but John and I traded off and got a couple of Avery and Colton.

Then I got a couple of cute ones with G-ma and Mom.

Looking forward to going back for Thanksgiving!

Visit with the Marts | Warwick, RI

2009-11-07T09:59:00.002-05:00

Since we are in Baltimore, we thought we would try to take a drive up to RI to see the Marts. Living in SC makes it challening to see them that often, so we wanted to take advantage of being so close. I was pleasantly surprised when we discovered it was only 5 hours away! While we were there, we made a trip to another pumpkin patch. Henry is certainly getting used to pumkins! It was super bright and super windy out, but we made the most of it!

John and Henry with Caroline and Joseph ... I still can't get over how much they've grown!

Henry trying to stay warm ...

Our view from the back of the hayride ...

Having fun!

The Pumpkin Farm | Baltimore, MD

2009-11-06T10:05:00.007-05:00

When we first got to Baltimore we were staying in a hotel, so we tried to get out as much as possible. Being in a hotel for an extended period of time is never fun, but when you have a baby with you it can be anything from extremely challenging to pure hell. Hence the getting out part. Our favorite outing there was the pumpkin farm. We took Henry last year when he was just 2 months old:

And this year when he was 14 months old:

It was super bright in the sun, so we found him some shade to play in.

We got back on the hayride with a pumpkin he picked himself!

And a family portrait to end the day ...

New

2009-11-04T12:08:00.003-05:00

It's time ... a new blog for a new season. I wanted to have a space just for my family, my thoughts, my new life. I am no longer photographer or counselor. I am no longer "professional." I am simply wife, mom, and friend. It's wierd ... this stripping away of roles that defined me for so long. I am grateful, though, and I am learning. Thanks for joining me in this new season.